The Real Mom's Resume

I am going back to work. Yikes. This means I have had to update my resume, which hasn't been done in about 5 years, double yikes.  After begging friends and relatives to send me theirs so I could get some idea of what a professional person was supposed to say about themselves, I came up with one that isn't half bad.  But as I was googling "resume adjectives" so that I wasn't just using words like "smart and nice" I started to think about what my resume would look like if I was being my brutally honest, semi-snarky self.  Just for fun I thought I'd share.

Mommy Kate Blinn

Objective: Stay-at-home mom desperately seeking an opportunity to have adult conversations and renew my self-worth while adding as little additional stress to my life as possible.

Skills
Multitasking: reading a children's book while cooking dinner and checking Facebook.
Positivity: keeping a child happy and distracted when they have just projectile vomited all over the couch and their father.
Good under pressure: not losing my shit when i've been asked the same question for the 47th time in 12 minutes (don't ask what happens at number 48)
Articulate: able to explain the difference between bras and boobies to a 2 1/2 year old boy with a straight face.
Other skills include; seeming empathetic or interested in ridiculous situations, calming irrational tiny humans under extreme duress, cooking meals that never get finished, and cuddling.

Experience
I used to have real jobs with real responsibilities and I was really good at them.  Yet I can't remember exactly what those duties were because I created another life and he took all my brain cells.


So if anyone has a job that could use someone like me i'd really appreciate the opportunity! Also, be prepared for me to talk about my kid a bunch, i'm going to miss the heck out of him.

Starting the "Lasts"

We are roughly 3 months out from our desert departure (yikes!), and the great goodbye tour has started.  First we are starting with some of our favorite places, and then unfortunately, as is the way of the Marine Corps we will have to say our farewells to friends.  But today we started with the Palm Springs Aerial Tramway and Mt. San Jacinto.  Its a place we have loved to come to escape the heat of the desert and have visited at least 6 or 7 times with various family members and by ourselves.  It's gorgeous, reminds us of Colorado and never fails to renew our love of the outdoors and bring us closer as a family.  Today we did about 4.2 miles with about a 500 ft elevation gain, followed by beers and an ice cream.  It was cloudy up top, and even sprinkled some rain on us for a few minutes (!) and the visibility into the basin was terrible from heat/smog/smoke.  But it was a beautiful day and it will always be a place we hold dear and think of fondly.  Bye tram!

 Heading up

 Top look out

 Round Valley meadow

 Heading down

 Mountain side looking up

Desert below